@SortaBad: Glad my car insurance company requires a 10 character password to log-in. Wouldn't want someone to hack in and...pay my insurance bill
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@neiltyson: #WhenIWasYourAge: We had to open all doors by ourselves. None of them knew we were coming.
@rw_powers: 40% of divorces stem from $ issues. 40% are caused by infidelity. The remaining 20% have been linked to IKEA purchases requiring assembly.
@fuzzlime: sometimes when I finish eating a bag of microwave popcorn I try to eat a couple unpopped kernels just to convince myself it's really over