@knotyuraverage: Go hard or stay average
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@TexasHickspanic: I can only please one person a day, and i already pleased myself this morning.. so y'all are screwed!
@TravLeBlanc: I'm working on inventing an electronic Ouija board so that I can keep tweeting after I die.
@Instinctivetip: [marriage counselling] Her: he always thinks he's talking to me on CB radio Me: I don't, over Her: It's over Me: It's what? Over