@living_marble: "Go to hell" is so abstract. "Get trapped in a porta potty for 67 months." Now that's specific. That's possible. That's terrifying.
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@causticbob: Why do sanitary towel adverts always feature a liquid which is blue? Are aliens their primary customers?
@LaLuchaNix: I just watched Grease and it makes me sad how kids today are too lazy to buy matching leather jackets and smoke cigarettes.
@pinupteacher: [speed dating] Anyway, do you have a baby hedgehog? "No." *I take a deep breath and roll my eyes* [timer beeps]