@samalmightysam: God created women and the devil taught her to smile.
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@rcromwell4: I told my five-year-old she's due for a performance review and she ignored me. That's definitely going in the review.
@QwertyJones3: Let's name him something that will make children smile "How about Santa?" Ok but let's add something fierce so they are afraid to defy him
@fro_vo: Cop: we have you surrounded! Get down on the ground now! Cardboard Man: sigh not again *cops start breakdancing*