@maratesk: God gave you alcohol, sex and music. Why do you all talk about politics?!
@AmishPornStar1: Petulant: (defn.) a cat or dog you let a friend borrow
@954LeenO: I am fluent in three languages...english, sarcasm, and profanity
@UrbanDouchebag: I wonder if flies ever think, "I bet I could get this guy to slap himself in the face."
Because they'd be right.
@mommy_cusses: So funny how "go to sleep" and "do parkour" sound exactly the same to kids.
@TheAlexNevil: Me: Who's a good boy?
Dog: I thought we settled this.