@WornOutMommy: God grant me the patience to accept the people whose outfits I cannot change.
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@jjhartinger: 1995: [goes to store, video is rented] Maybe next time 2017: [netflix takes 5 mins to load] This is a nightmare
@OhNoSheTwitnt: Pregnant coworker with 3 children who always complains about money: When are YOU going to start having kids? Me: When are you going to stop?
@megankcomedy: I experimented a ton in college. I tried naps in the evening, naps in the morning, sometimes even 3 naps in a row.