@WornOutMommy: God grant me the patience to accept the people whose outfits I cannot change.
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@Breadery: Her: I like the man-horsey in this film. He's hot. Me: Centaur. H: What? M: Centaur H: Is that his name? M: I want a divorce.
@TheTweetOfGod: "Why do bad things happen to good people?" To even out the good things that happen to bad people.
@AlanHungover: No Girlfriend November was a success, now for Don't Date December, Just Me January, Forever Alone February, No Match March..... I got this.
@Book_Krazy: Me: [walks up to boss] *SLAP* Boss: WTH?! Me: It's Natl Bully Month Boss: No, it's Natl Bully PREVENTION Month! Me: well this is awkward