@murrman5: "so, have you ever done a job interview over the phone before?" [over vigorous peeing] no, this will be a first

@Chumpstring: In high school I was voted Most Likely to Be Shot Dead While Trying to Steal Something of Moderate Value From a Texan.

@pakalupapito: whatever floats ur goat

@VanVeenB: Ain't no sunshine when she's gone..... or sandwiches.... Ain't no sandwiches either.

@RatBatallion: Just realized all my tweets are about my genitals . Time to change the subject. Do you believe in aliens ? If so , do they have genitals?