@notalogin: God never gives you more than you can handle. But I'm not God. I'm just a bag boy. And you'll wanna take these groceries out in the cart.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Julian_Deane: With all the ways to contact me on social media these days the police still smash through my door unannounced again?
@carlyken: Reporter: so what is it like being in Maroon 5 when you're not Adam Levine, um Mr. Uh- *quickly googles for his name but google has no idea*
@NurseMurderer: him: what are you looking for on this dating site? me: someone who will hold the cats down so I can take pics of them wearing sunglasses.
@BeardSpice: "Two birds with one stone, how about all the birds" God thinks, hurling an asteroid toward Earth