@Smug_Lemur: God only gives you what you can handle. Really? Because I'm pretty sure I could handle way more money.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@truegritrumble: ME: *holding my crying newborn son* There. There. I ALSO find myself very upsetting.
@robotmouthfarts: Her: So what do you do? Him: I'm a pickup artist. Her: Pig! [leaves] Him: *sighs* [puts away prints of exquisitely painted Ford F-150s]
@shatterpants: I like to tell people "it's a black thing, you wouldn't understand."And they'd be all "but you're white" I told ya you wouldn't understand.