@LizHackett: God returns to his desk with lunch. Taking a bite, he looks over at video monitors marked "Earth". The avocado drops out of his sandwich.
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@jnrbtsn: The worst part about being single is always doing what I want. Anytime. Anywhere. With whomever. That sucks.
@WheelTod: Always use a fish knife when eating fish, a tomato knife when eating tomato, and a Swiss Army knife when eating a member of the Swiss army.
@0hJuliette: I'm bored, think I'll go to the mall, find a great parking spot, sit in my car with my reverse lights on
@WstonesOxfordSt: BOOK FACT: If you took every book in our store and laid them end to end you would be thrown out by security and banned from returning.