@LizHackett: God returns to his desk with lunch. Taking a bite, he looks over at video monitors marked "Earth". The avocado drops out of his sandwich.
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@3sunzzz: My doctor said I need to drink more water every day, so I have started putting ice cubes in my vodka.
@SteveSuckington: Who cares about throwing stones? How do people in glass houses hide when somebody knocks on the door?
@Swain_Train47: My favorite thing to do in cities is walk down busy sidewalks, pass by people, and say into my phone "Target is on the move.”
@jordan_stratton: I like to intentionally barge into guys wearing camo and then look around bewildered like I have no idea what I just ran into.