@BadIuckBrian: Goes to church to find God's love. Friendzoned.
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@Flattliner: The last time Twitter was down I was forced to speak to real people. Real people go on and on and on and on, for way over 140 characters...
@seanyeatts: Growing up means you start to find it creepy that your dad's pet name for your mom is "Squirty"
@timdonakowski: As long as you're good at blending in, you can be part of Brad and Angelina's family too.