@Schindizzle: Going to a Kenny G concert must feel like being on hold for two hours.
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@Parentpains: Apparently "I'll break your god damn legs" isn't the problem solving skills that employers are looking for, at least according to HR anyway.
@gerryhallcomedy: Women have a good 6th sense. I smiled at a girl in the mall once. When I got home I opened the door and my wife met me with a drop kick.
@NicestHippo: The inventor of the toilet must've had a rough time at his presentation. "Oh here comes Gary with his poop throne idea"
@donni: Strawberry is a terrible name. "Ooh, a berry with all the flavor of a straw," you'd think. But you'd be wrong