@qwertying: "Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car."
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@iinkedZombie: [after tee ball game] Wife: we brought snacks for the kids. Me: [w/ mouthful of food] we did?!
@TheMichaelRock: I ain't sayin she a gold digger, but she has a helmet with a flashlight on it, and a pick axe.
@Fatgoldfish4: I dunno if anyone else follows Play-Doh on Facebook but you should cause they're doing some serious damage control
@3_arbutus: There are 363 days till Christmas and people already have their Christmas lights up. Unbelievable.