@TwoSapphiresBlu: Going to start a band called The Subtweets. All songs will contain cryptic lyrics that incite paranoia in the crowd.
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@envydatropic: How long before your caterpillars will turn into butterflies? Me looking at your eyebrows
@TheCatWhisprer: *wife grabs my wrist as I go overboard* Her: You're... slipping... Me: Pretend I'm the covers. *she easily pulls me to safety with one arm*
@darinlovesbacon: Your honor I object! That other lawyer is saying stuff that makes my client look guilty