@causticbob: goldfish mafia
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@Marlebean: Oh that's cute you think the worst sound is "nails on a chalkboard"... Here, borrow my kids for an hour.
@RandySmithWhat: "[I] broke up with him because I was sick of justifying his trench coat to my friends" - Overheard on the bus
@CrockettForReal: Him: you’re beautiful. Her: no I’m not, hehe. Him: yes, you are. Her: you’re crazy, I’m hideous. Him: oh, ok. I see it now.
@Shade510: * Dentist is singing along to a Maroon 5 song as he’s drilling in my mouth. Me: (holds up finger to pause) Can you turn that up? Dentist: The music? Me: No. The drill. Dentist: