@TheCatWhisprer: Golf is probably fun if you like walking around outside in business casual.
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@topaz_kell: When there's a police car behind you with their lights flashing... It means speed up, right?
@VaguelyFunnyDan: Ate shrooms & I feel nothing. Just an awful taste in my mouth. Also the dealer overcharged me. Also he's a centaur with spiders for lips
@StormErika: People keep escaping from maximum security jails and I can't even manage to leave 5 minutes early from work.
@Kimgee8: Relationship status: the doorbell rings, my heart is pounding, it's the pizza delivery guy. Three-cheese, double toppings, thick crust.