@JackieluvsUK: Gonna start feeding my dog condoms, so when she poops they're already in tiny little bags!
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@runningmascara6: I want to be the reason you look down at your phone and smile, then walk into a pole..
@WheelTod: "First gay marriage. What's next - people marrying dogs?!" *nervous glance at dog Dog: Frank, we've been over this. I like you as a friend
@DirtMcTurd: I swear if I see one more person enter this WalMart wearing pajamas I am going to take the belt off my bathrobe and choke them with it