@SaraESpivey: Good for you, the 3 people trying to keep MySpace alive. Good. For. You.
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@haveigotnews: Apple launches new phone with no headphone jack, making it ideal for enjoying the free U2 album.
@Dre_77_: Every time I hear a mean joke about being Canadian, I go right to the hospital and get my feelings checked for free.
@Sal0630: Girlfriend: Did you fix the dishwasher? Me: Yup *girlfriend opens dishwasher revealing a monkey covered in bubbles, holding a scrub brush*