@Coops_Bradley: Good luck to the 13 year old girl who is pregnant and wrote "California" for ethnicity on her clinic forms.
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@capricecrane: Alanis Morissette sings about having 10,000 spoons when all she needs is a knife. And nobody asks why she has 10,000 spoons?
@Book_Krazy: Mommy what's an "Act of God?" Me: *Flashback to my CrossFit trainer* Well dear, an "active god" is in his mid-20s and has a smokin hot body
@KenJennings: You guys, The Hobbit is a straight-up ripoff of my unreleased 3-hour experimental film "Helicopter Shots of People Walking."