@pixelatedboat: Good news, you survived the horrific car crash. Sadly we couldn't find the other guy's arms but we managed to reattach all four of yours
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@ericsshadow: Interview: "What's your greatest weakness?" *I look at my watch then lean in* How much time do you have?
@Pirate_nurse: I just shaved my legs for the first time in 2 weeks so if you will come clean out my tub I won't judge u for making a beautiful rug
@junejuly12: Sometimes I want to kidnap a few woman for two to three weeks so that their eyebrows can grow without fear