@egg_dog: good prank: sneak into someone's house every night over a year and replace thier toilet with a slightly larger one until it fills tthe room
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@ComedicBust: *Speed Dating* Me: What'd you have for lunch? Her: Funny you should ask, I had this really great salad wit... Me: NEXT!!
@juliussharpe: Someone tell my kid that if I wanted to hear high-pitched shrieking all night, I would have become a murderer.