@KKAlThani: Good thing girls started uploading pictures next to a pool with the caption "Summer is finally here!" or we wouldn't have known it's summer.
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@Home_Halfway: My wife's leaving me for refusing to stop referring to our children as my Capri Son and Capri Daughter.
@murrman5: "911" you gotta help, my wife is in labour in the backseat "how far apart are the contractions?" about 2 miles but I'm driving pretty fast
@Modern_Psyche: Writing a good suicide note is hard, especially if you don't know that person's handwriting.