@ibid78: "Goodnight moon."
*Moon takes out one earbud*
"No, Pepsi is not ok."
@whatmaddness: [at haunted house, as the walls bleed and screams echo through the hallways]
oh cool. our cycles are synced.
@anhonestmess: This is yr brain. This is yr brain on drugs. *turns page* This is yr brain on the beach at Cancun! Awwww, yr brain on yr honeymoon. *turns p
@OhNoSheTwitnt: If we get to have sex with our valentines on Valentine's Day I can't wait until Presidents' Day.
@SondraDeeMe: [job interview]
What experience do you have plucking chickens?
Me: See all those hairs on my chin?
@jonnysun: my milkshake brings all the boys to the yard / their like, is this organic? do u hav a vegan option? can u make it with froyo insted