@copymama: Got a text from an unknown number that said “I’m on my way,” so I'm tweeting this from the closet.
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@Jerrypleasure: me: kids are so stupid. they'll do anything for chocolate wife: if you do the laundry, I'll buy you a snickers me: done
@thepunningman: Police: Cover me Rookie: ok [pulls out guitar] Every little thing she does is magic