@Home_Halfway: Got kicked out of a mosh pit again for petting people's hair
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@Kendragarden: I wish I lived in the 20s so I could wear hats, smoke cigarettes and say stuff like, "Hey big cheese, this giggle water is the cat's meow."
@HeyZeus666: Fatherhood Tip : If there's puke in your coat pocket and poop on your shoulder, you're holding the baby upside down.
@kelkulus: Women say they want a guy who can make them laugh. I'd probably have done better if they'd specified that they didn't mean by tickling.
@zdarsky: I want a SPIDERMAN GO app where I have to get pictures of spiderman for a furious j jonah jameson