@noog: Guide to making everyone hate you:
Step 1) Turn your hat backwards
@wesjohnson8: I call in sick on full moons just to make them wonder.
@prncss_fifi: My parents think im a virgin. My boss thinks Im an excellent employee. The government thinks Im an outstanding citizen. Where's my Oscar?
@SadMeterologist: TRUTHFUL TUESDAY:
When my son was 7 he pissed me off so badly I pressed all the elevator buttons knowing every new rider would blame him.
@AdamUrbane: This hammock is the most relaxing thing I've ever had slingshot me point blank into the ground.
@What_A_Dame_42: Apparently it's not acceptable to moan when someone is demonstrating a choke hold on you in crisis prevention training.