@bazecraze: Guns don't avoid critical thinking by leaning on tired aphorisms. People do.
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@WilliamRodgers: Dr: Smoking weed causes memory loss Me: How? Dr: It just does Me: What just does? Dr: Smoking weed causes memory loss Me: How?
@AudreyPorne: If you drink 6 RedBulls in less than an hour, they're not allowed to arrest you for stealing a bus. Read the can if you don't believe me.
@ScottLinnen: Riding up in the elevator with a bunch of children. So much screaming & crying. You'd think one of them would ask me what the hell's wrong.
@murrman5: [the beeping to remind me to put on my seatbelt finally gives up] *looks at driving test instructor* "finally"