@AllyBallyBeal: Guy across the road can't get his truck started. Now he's rolled up his sleeves. That's how you start trucks. By rolling up your sleeves.
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@graceful_asfuck: Me: oil change plz Toyota: it'll be $39 Me: cool heres my $2 off coupon 4 hrs later T: ur steering wheel fell off total is $2900 sign here
@Laser_Cat: Alfred: *placing pancakes in the shape of the Bat Signal* Here are your pancakes, Master W- Bruce: They're Batcakes Alfred. Say "Batcakes!"
@thepunningman: Farmer: I love my job Wife: But all you do all day is round up cows Farmer: What did you say to me? Wife: You herd