@blaudiablogan: Guy asked me where I got my green eyes. Great! Now I have to explain what the Vikings did when they got to Sicily.
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@1Happytwit: Dont think about tomorrow because thats when the judge starts using the term premeditated.
@themiltron: interviewer: why do you want this job me: i've just always been very passionate about not starving to death
@dafloydsta: Me: You'll always be my girl. Daughter: Even if I break stuff? Me: Depends on which stuff.
@senderblock23: If you love something, let it go. Unless that thing is a cat. Your cat will not come back.