@LurkAtHomeMom: Wow, you forget to buy beer a few days in a row and suddenly your husband is offering to do the grocery shopping, my plan is working, guys.
@Vice_Queen: [Blazing hot day]
Don't forget to take a jacket, it might get cold.
~ My mom.
@TheTweetOfGod: A cannibal is just a foodie who likes other foodies.
@sixfootcandy: My dog is sleeping soundly now that I've removed myself from his king sized bed.
@jus4golf: My daughter wants a smart car for her 16th birthday. She thinks it will do her geometry homework.