@nerdreign: Guys, I have to stop cyber-bullying North Korea. They called my mom.
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@GaryJanetti: I just found out five people I went to high school with are dead. What's taking the rest of them so long?
@neiltyson: A curious tradition -- to look at a newborn baby and say to yourself, "Because of your DNA, one day you will rule over me."
@TheCiscoKidder: The length of time toddlers stare at each other on the playground would get you stabbed if you did that shit as an adult.