@TylerLinkin: Had a date with a lady I met on Christian Mingle. It was going fine until I told her I was Jewish & her half of the bill was $40 dollars.
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@KevinFarzad: Real girls have curves. A real girl is just one long, continuous curve. Do not date girl unless she is a parabola.
@EJGomez: [sees a baby spit up after drinking from baby bottle] "lmao yo who invited the lightweight"
@robyn_vo: Watched the movie Gravity tonight. Didn't see as much gravity as I expected. Two thumbs down based on that.