@crimson_n_aqua: Had a discussion with my boss about how lanyards can strangle.... conversation took a turn.... I am either fired or getting a HUGE raise x2
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@BlindChow: Me: Got your nose! Baby: *drags from cig* Let me tell you how this is going down. You give me back my nose & maybe I let u walk out of here.
@ItMightBeJimbo: Two seats open. One next to a good looking girl who noticed me as I walked in. The other by a wall outlet. She'll find love in another man.
@Carbosly: I love it when waiters tell me to tell them when to stop grating cheese on my meal. It's cheese, dude. We'll be here a while.
@SoulYodeler: Yes I am 45, male and love cats. Recently I posted a selfie. It could be worse though, right? Hello?