@DurtMcHurtt: Had a dream some of my friends were mooning me, woke up at the crack of Don.
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@SocialExtortion: I wish you would step back from that ledge, my friend. Seriously, I'm taking a selfie and you're in the background
@SteveKoehler22: Hey big accounts - What's it like to tweet "My cat sneezed" and get 500 RT in the first minute ? My cat would be dead before I got 50
@WhiskeySoured: To protest Donald Sterling's racist comments I'm going to continue to not care about basketball.