@scorpiusryan21: Had a skype interview yesterday and I completely avoided the fact that I am actually a centaur
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@Jen_Mahabir: If we ever travel thousands of light years to a planet with intelligent life - lets just make patterns in their crop and leave.
@ihuffpaint: what do you mean I never take you anywhere we just took a 365 day trip around the sun
@GrantTanaka: Txt from wife: where r u Me:kitchen Wife:can u feed cat M: I mean garage W:bring in laundry M:bathroom W:clean toilet M: Idaho W:get potatos
@Black__Elvis: I’m hot blooded, check it & see/ I got a fever of 103/ why’s everyone on the bus screaming/ maybe I shoulda wiped off the rectal thermometer