@BruceForce: Haha, murder? No officer, I just wanted to see what would happen if I planted a human
@RandiLawson: Nice try horror movies, but everyone in my generation is already terrified to answer their phones
@peterjames48: Autocorrect wants to capitalize bacon, out of respect.
@Muath_tu: Lil Wayne is like if a doctor's handwriting came to life.
@drewtoothpaste: #SCOTUS one-star review
@joeyfullystated: Autocorrect changed Italian to Taliban, so now I'm sure the NSA is super interested in my ricotta cheese.