@offbeatoliv: Half my family is Catholic, the other half Jewish, so when the tweet contest theme is "guilt" I pretty much have it in the bag.
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@jenyb4: Cw: you have a call holding M: put it in my voicemail Cw: he has a sexy Australian accent M: hiiii this is Jennifer
@caseytduncan: If a turkey got murdered, the chalk outline would look like a giant preschooler's hand.
@POTerritory: The only thing more predictable than the conspiracy theories is some people's inability to distinguish Indonesia from Malaysia. #AirAsia