@Brentweets: Halloween combines my 3 least favorite things: Answering the door, giving away food and children.
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@SteveSuckington: [bleeding out] ER Doctor: do you know your blood type? ME: I've never really thought about it TBH. As long as it has a good personality
@mommy_cusses: Me: [Hanging one-handed from a cliff, seconds away from death] My kid: Can you hold this?