@Birdhumms: "Happy Anniversary to you both, may you have a long marriage with many more years ahead" she hexed.
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@tiffinysawyers: Sorry, but breaking up with you on facebook was the best way of letting all your friends know I'm available.
@Coolisiana: (Ad for a baby) • gently used • can't even kill you • doesn't shed • poops on a learning curve • goes from 0-60 in roughly 60 years
@Parentpains: Some coworkers remind me of my ex, because I would jump in front of a bus to get out of a conversation with them too.
@murrman5: [rose from the movie titanic a couple years later sitting on crowded bus] excuse me, can you slide over so I ca- "NO, there's no room"