@stockejock: Happy birthday to rapper Pitbull who is 34 today, or 238 in dog years for all the other Pitbulls.
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@Phook75: It surely can't be a coincidence that Alexander the Great and Kermit the Frog share the same middle name
@JonnyGoodTimes: My girlfriend HATES it when I sneak up on her. According to her lawyer she also hates it when I call her my girlfriend ( ._.)
@NoticablyBacon: December 26th is the sad day where I have to take the Christmas tree behind the garage and shoot it