@michaelianblack: Happy Fourth of July. May your emails be gathered and your drones fly forever free!
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@tastefactory: When I was going into surgery my dad said "Good luck w/ your surgery" and I said "you too" so now my dad has to get surgery too, he's pissed
@msdanifernandez: My mom's favorite internet game is "Log me into the Facebook. Is this the Facebook? Is that your brother? Why is he drinking upside down?"
@SortaBad: i imagine the people who slaved for years perfecting the google search algorithm would be so mad knowing i mainly use it now for spellcheck
@noog: Cop: Is that a turtle? Me: ... Cop: Painted blue? Me: ... Cop: With nails glued on? Me: ... Cop: Mario Kart's not real Me: YOURE NOT REAL