@atDevin: Happy Let's-Pretend-This-Relationship-Is-Still-Working Day
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@lilgapeach30: If my co-worker says ValenTIMES one more time, I'ma need one of you to make good on the "I'll help you hide a body" promise.
@Easy_Tiger__: Girls are like puppies. If you don't take them out enough, they'll poop on your rug. SERIOUSLY ASHLEY ON MY RUG??
@TheCatWhisprer: On my home screen I surrounded the Fitbit app with a bunch of food delivery apps so it knows what's up.
@MUMSIEesq: If my 3YO's fortune was "you will eat the paper inside the cookie and then cry about it for 2 hrs," this Chinese restaurant is VERY accurate