@GabbbarSingh: Happy Teacher's day, Wikipedia.
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@david8hughes: POLICE! OPEN UP, WE KNOW YOU'RE IN THERE. WELL, WE DON'T KNOW BUT WE'RE KINDA HOPING YOU ARE COS IT WAS A LONG DRIVE & JIM NEEDS TO PEE.
@heidi420x: I haven't been drinking. I know what day it is. I didn't lose my pants. This might be my car. I know how to drive. -Lies I've told to cops.
@OfficeofSteve: Instead of cursing and swearing when someone cuts me off in traffic, I just yell lyrics from Spice Girl songs out the window
@genehunter1: What kind of name for a storm is "Debby?" Hurricanes should have names like "Satan" No one should have their house destroyed by "Heather."