@TheCiscoKidder: Harness the power of my dog's wagging tail and we could step into a much greener future.
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@tastefactory: Young mom: My baby is 34 months Me: Oh really I'm 407 months yeah I hope you like doing math you piece of shit
@dril: fired for "unleashing rats at work" which is bull shit first off because they don't make leashes for rats
@SarcasticAlly12: Me to my toddler: Listen up, small human. Here are some farm animal sounds you should learn to prepare you to climb the corporate ladder.