@Hilarious_Idiot: Harry Potter fans: I wanna go to Hogwarts. Narnia fans: I wanna go to Narnia. Hunger Games fans: Nope I'm good..
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@michaelianblack: Internet, just because I bought shoes from you once doesn't mean I'm going to do it again. You're coming across as desperate.
@rolldiggity: CASHIER: "Did you find everything you were looking for?" ME: "Oh, yes..." [places "How To Murder A Cashier" book on counter]
@TheHyyyype: *young people decide to avoid hard drugs and lead healthier lifestyles* BUSINESS INSIDER HEADLINE: millenials are killing the meth industry