@Skullcat: Hate to brag, but a cute fireman gave me his number today. It's only 3 digits & he said it's only for emergencies, but I know what he meant
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@ibid78: You kids have no idea how lucky you are. Back in my day we had to shave our jokes into the sides of cats and throw those cats at passers by.
@dariatbh: I hope all the friends I've made in the bathroom at 1am are still SO pretty and everything worked out with that boy they were drunk texting
@AmishPornStar1: I'm not saying I'm an idiot... But if some village comes looking...tell them you never saw me.
@heidi420x: "What'd you do today" "Went on a treasure hunt" "I hope you mean job hunt" "Treasure hunt" "You need to find a job" "Not if I find treasure"