@AnkCoupleTO: Have single guys scared of the "Friend Zone" even heard of long-term relationships or marriage?
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@mrtruthandsoul: If you see a porcupine in your yard, that's my cat and we're not done with our accupuncture session.
@shkeeber: Mom: Why are you eating my flowers? Me: I'm gonna be young FOREVER! Mom: How? Me: Duh, from the stem cells. Mom: I'm worried about you.
@sarcasticmommy4: I hate it when I'm on twitter & there isn't a car behind me to honk when the light is green.
@eric10F: "will you be paying with cash or credit?" "Cash" *start playing "ring of fire" on my kazoo *gets tackled by security*