@robfee: Have you ever thought about how weird it is that one of your hands is dumber than the other?
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@ConorTripler: my GOTH DAD license plate is not a vanity plate it is a coincidence. random string of letters. could ve happened to a dad without eyeliner
@hellohappy_time: Me: [shaking uncontrollably watching political satire] Her: are you alright? Me: YES THIS IS HOW I RELAX NOW
@xLiserx: Trench coats are dangerous. How do you know who’s a detective, a flasher, or two muppets? You just don’t know. YOU JUST DON’T KNOW!!