@Mainstream_Man: Have you seen the new movie, "Constipation"? It may not have come out yet.
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@DadandBuried: *putting kid to bed* Me: Goodnight, buddy, I love you. Sleep tight. 7yo: Dad, you have to make sugar cookies to bring to class tomorrow. Goodnight!
@noog: GET OVER HERE thunders across the bar as a harpooned rope impales a beautiful girl. The bartender smiles and shakes his head at Scorpion.
@JamieGreenlees: I don't hate you, but if you we're drowning, I would dive in and handcuff a piano to your neck.