@DBMaxP: Having a dog around pretty much denies any opportunity to take advantage of the 5 second rule on a dropped chip
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@abhorrent_wife: Please, baseball fans. Enthrall me with complex details about a game where someone hits the ball with a stick and runs around in a circle.
@autocorrects: You're the jelly to my burger, the knife to my soup, the glitter to my sushi, and the ketchup to my icecream. My point is, you're worthless.